27 March 2012

You're gonna stick that where?

I woke up bright eyed and bushy tailed this morning.
The sun was shining, birds were singing.
I arrived at work on time, didn't have any 'urgent' matters to attend to first thing, my $2.00 tea was made perfectly (stirred and all!).

Then, just when I thought it couldn't get any better - BAM! Unexpected internal ultrasound. 

I feel dirty.

Too much information?

20 March 2012

This day in history..1979 to be exact.

Today is the day.
I have successfully reached a full 33 years of maintaining a 100% survival record and general high level of awesomeness.

It was in the 5 o'clock pm hour.
My mother's second baby, first and only time with epidural.
My father was busy investigating a murder and wouldn't make it to the hospital until I was hours old.

They called me Amy.
I have a Gerber baby spoon engraved with the inititals AB.
They changed their minds after months and months.

It's my birthday, bitches.

5 March 2012

pass the chicken soup.

On Thursday Sydney came home from school sick - big deal for her since she is a genius who never misses class.
On Friday the school secretary called because Liam barfed all.over.the.library. Delicious.

After spending 4 gruelling days nursing them both back to some semblance of health I find myself sitting here at my grey cold hell cubicle coughing like a Canadian goose honking into blow horn. People are spraying me with Lysol and throwing lozenges at me - my immediate dodge-ball reaction is to catch them and throw them back, as hard as possible, right at their heads. Even the plague can't stop my awesomeness.

Happy Monday.